The following article was printed in the April Issue of M Magazine. I was contacted last month to be included in a Feature of three “Inspiring Moms.” The Editor wanted to do a piece on local Moms overcoming their children’s tragic health issues, she knew we had founded our organization in Memory of Spencer because I had sent over information last year to be included in Service Project Ideas for kids.
(I feel more like a crazy mom, than an inspiring mom trying to keep our 3 kids in line with all their every day activities and all that is involved, but I do appreciate “M” for asking me to put into words our story. Thanks “M” and Susan Cannon!)
Article: When the road to rearing children was interrupted by tragic health issues, these local women rose above pain to fight for the cause.
For expectant parents, nothing – nothing – is more frightening than hearing those dreaded words: something is wrong. But it does happen, and often the consequences of those discoveries are heartbreaking. However, for these inspiring local moms, distress did not mean defeat. In fact, all of these women have put their hard-learned lessons to work for others, raising awareness and money for the causes that area so close to their hearts. We are humbled by their bravery, touched by their courage and inspired to bring their stories, here, in their own words, to your attention.
Below is our section of the article:
Teresa Stockton recently brought her important philanthropy, Spencer’s Treasures, to Kansas City in memory of her late son.
Spencer was born a healthy baby boy with big brown eyes and a head full of dark hair. His dad named him Morgan Spencer. He was born in Newport Beach, California. Morgan means “by the sea” so it was the perfect name. Although we loved the name. it seemed formal for such a little guy so we decided to call him by his middle name.
He was our first born and the light of our lives. He was a very happy adorable boy that melted everyone with his bright personality. But around age 3 1/2 we noticed changes in Spence, his right eye started turning in and his speech become impaired. The symptoms were being treated individually and it wasn’t until after a second failed corrective eye surgery did a Doctor order a CT scan to see if anything neurological was going on. After a CT scan and a MRI to confirm, our beautiful little boy was diagnosed with a rare brain tumor in his brain stem. We were told it was inoperable because of its location and with little chance of survival. (I’ll never forget the Doctor drawing out a little sketch of a brain and explaining different types of tumors and the seriousness of each. He pointed to the brain stem saying this is where the fatal tumors are located. Then he drew an X on it and told us that was where Spencer’s tumor was.)
Our battle began that week and we battled it hard! Spencer was our hero. Not once during his six-weeks of radiation treatments did he complain. He endured three surgeries, one for a Craniotomy (which was a mini miracle because they were able to remove 50% of the tumor after the radiation helped centralized it into an area they could get to). The second was for a shunt, to release the pressure and the swelling on the brain, the third Gamma Knife (a centralized form of radiation). We were able to endure all we did because our “Spence Man” was such an inspiration. During those eight months, he continued to make us laugh and he taught us life. Although we never told him he was going to die, I knew in my heart that he knew. (We called the tumor a bump and he knew something was wrong and he knew we needed to try to get rid of the bump that was making him feel bad.)
After eight months of continuous battle, Spencer died two days after his fifth birthday in 2000.
Shortly after Spencer passed away, the thing that kept going through my mind were the little toys we would give to Spencer after each of his countless appointments. The hospitals only had stickers to hand out so on the way home we would stop at the local fast food restaurant and get a Kids’ Meal so Spencer could have the toy. (He considered this his reward for being brave.) As his conditioned progressed and he could barely talk, the one thing he could say was “toy.” He would hold onto it all day-it was comforting to him.
After tossing and turning one night, the whole “Spencer’s Treasures” plan came into my head. I woke my husband and told him we are going to donate treasure chests to hospitals in areas where Spencer went and we would start having toy drives and fill the chests on an on-going basis for other children going through invasive type procedures.
I contacted Spencer’s preschool and our church and they had toy drives in Spencer’s memory. In April 2000, we donated the first three chests.
Eleven years later we have donated nearly 60 chests with thousands of toys, donated in Spencer’s memory to hospitals in Southern California and in Kansas City.
Four years ago, we moved here to be closer to family and now I’m hands-on here in KC and volunteers continuing the joy in California. Treasure your loved ones is the best advice I can give. I sometimes laugh at parents that get caught up in the “best preschools, best parties, grades” and all the other things parents choose to get caught up in, because everyday is a gift and nothing is guaranteed. I learned that lesson a second time when we lost a twin to our now 2-year-old just two days after her delivery. (They were born 10 weeks early and my Tabby was in the NICU for almost 6 weeks)
I miss Spencer everyday but we now have 3 children to share his legacy with. They have always helped with Spencer’s Treasures and they share it with others. The five of us recently celebrated Spencer’s 16th birthday pizza and a homemade cake. It was his favorite and is our annual family birthday tradition to celebrate his short life with us.
Spencer’s Treasures also tries to raise awareness about Pediatric Brain Tumor symptoms and support. A section about that appears on our blog.
In order to donate more chests in the Kansas City area we need organizations and schools to embrace Spencer’s Treasures by collecting toys throughout the year. Even local businesses can participate. The best types of toys are small, hand-size toys. Toys need to be new.
If you would like to help, email us at SpencersTreasures@gmail.com
(The section below was edited out, but I think it’s important for those that are going through challenging times with sick children)
Losing a child is the worst thing that can happen and watching them decline is gut wrenching and almost unbearable. I truly relied on Faith, Family and Friends to get us through. We had a wonderful support system and although it was hard at first to reach out to them but when I finally did, meals were being prepared for us, friends cared for my 2 year old at the time so I could take Spencer to his appointments. Family and friends would visit regularly with toys in hand and a smile on their face, no matter the condition he was in. It was like we were all in it together, and I felt powerful knowing we had an army behind us.
